Well i guess the title explain it all. Weird I know,but none the less this last month bin hell. You see I am lucky but seem to be unlucky to date a new taint in the Adult Industry. Now I'm sure your all like Bullshit! No way! Quit your bitching rite? Well theirs a lot more to it than you think. You see it all started back about a little over a year ago. My girl "of 11yrs mind you" were heading into town to grab some shit at the store. When she got a text from her friend. It read "We just had sex on the internet and 600 people just watched us!". we looked at each other after she read it n laughed! With a shit eating grin on my girls face she ask them how, n where!LOL! So they gave us the link to the site n we checked it out. Well low n behold we said fuck it lets try. We set up our web cam one night n we did our thing. Was the coolest rush we had in a long time. We loved it so much we kept doing it. Went on for a year, when one day at my normal job something really fucked up happened. I was approached by a man who was getting a tour at this manufacturing plant I worked at. Well to make this part of te story short he recognize my tattoos, n hence we decided to go into porn.....
Now little did we know what all went into it but here we are. With both our hard work we got her in the bizz. She is currently working out in LA as an Adult Talent. Now I bet your wondering where this title comes in. For me this great thing that has blessed my love in here life is my personal hell at the moment. We are currently many miles apart, due to her being new in the industry she can not let it be known that she has a boyfriend. I haven't even talked to her in almost a month. The text messages stopped, I don't even get to see pics of her unless i look her up. Hurts like you don't even know. the not knowing anything, felling like your not n will never b a part of her life again. All i have is my solitude, which brings out the past demons. Lets out them skeletons you worked so hard to lock up. Mine was a nasty drug addiction. A mix of Ecstasy, Heroin, and what ever else I could find. Yea good times. Its hard not to go back to the old ways. I mean the one that got me to quit all that is not here anymore. Has a completely separate life that will never include me it seems. So i am left with every day doubt. I spend my time working out, playing on my PC, and listing to music.
Still those no good voices r their and talking their shit. Just cant make them stop, n its wherein heavy on my soul. I go to bed hoping that the next day be better. Hoping she will call, give good news, let me know when we get to reunite. My only fear is my fear of what she will think of normal me when she is a big name in the industry............
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